its so weird to look at everyone now that i've known for years
girls are catching pregnancy like its the plague
those who've managed to avoid, seem to have some idea what they want to do with their life

not me

i'm taking classes and getting bored with them
working the same jobs i have been for almost 2 years...and getting bored with them

i dont belong in food
and i'm not good at selling

changing my haircolor to satisfy that need in general for change....well its becoming unhealthy for my hair

i guess adam helped that out for the few weeks he was here
now he calls me constantly....to get angry and upset, and goes to the other end of the state to get away from me....

goddamn, in my last post i asked him not to use me and leave me.....i have become one of my own personal hatreds, ben

not ben tolar the person, what ben did to me

i turned around 6 months later and did it to someone else

what does that make me?